this is me.

Kimm is a fun girl; she is might what you call bubbly, she has an extroverted personality, perfect for employment at a camp. With a Ramons tee-shirt and men’s Levis jeans and short dyed red hair, Kim just by looking at her is an interesting person.

I met Kimm a few months after I started working at a camp south of Grand Rapids. About a year ago we were driving down the highway talking about whatever till she noticed a black hard back book sitting in my back seat.

The book she picked up was ‘Adventures in Missing the Point’ by Tony Compolo and Brian McLaren. This book examines of issues of the faith and culture and from their perspective dialogue about the points missed by the church.

I knew Kimm wasn’t a Christian; she had made that clear to me when I told her that my previous job was working at a large church in Grand Rapids. When I told her, she looked at me like I just told her I ran away to join the circus, though in many ways that church was much like a circus. Because of this reaction, I was curious to see how she would react to Compolo’s and McLaren’s writings.

I got comfortable, tilting my drivers seat back, and started driving like a white gangsta and let her read. A few minutes past by and she looked up and asked me my feelings on homosexuality and homosexual marriage. With out even thinking about it, I went into Jerry Farwell mode and started to regurgitate what has been engrained in my head by the evangelical church. To be honest, it wasn’t quite Farwell, but it wasn’t Jesus either. I didn’t even think about why she might ask such a question.

I told her how it doesn’t line up with God’s plan for creation. I told Kimm that marriage was intended for a man and a woman, and I told her that specifically marriage is reserved for a man and a woman and not persons of the same sex. I said all this with the same rhetoric that is communicated in the church.

Later that night we were strolling through the mall, making conversation about the various people passing us. We kept walking and soon a girl walked up to us whom obviously knew Kimm and started to have a conversation with her. I stood there and tried not to pay to much attention to what they were saying. As I was trying to pretend like I was interested in a flyer for some nail solon, one sentence caught my attention, “Are you still with that one girl, what’s her name,” she instantly looked at me to see if I noticed and waited for me to react. I tried not to, but in my mind I was yelling at myself for our little homosexual conversation that took place about an hour previous.

She finished up her friendly exchange with her friend and we continued to walk. She was obviously flustered and a little upset. “I can’t believe she out’ed me like that,” she said while crossing her arms and looking down. “Patrick, I hope that doesn’t bother you that I’m gay.” “Not at all, don’t worry about it,” I responded, not wanting to embarrass her anymore than she already was.

I really wasn’t bothered; I really didn’t know what to think. I am embarrassed to say that after 8 years of being a Christian, I hadn’t known or was friends with any homosexual. Oh sure I had met some, but I had never hung out with them. Up until this point this was reserved exclusively for Christians. Flowed thinking I know, but this is all I had known.

God has taught me that in order to connect with His heart, I must begin to connect with the culture in which I live. I begin to read the gospels so much differently after God began to reveal these things to me. I began to see the love and compassion that Jesus had for ordinary people. The biggest thing that struck me was not the respect and awe these people showed Jesus, but they thought of Jesus as a normal friend, whom they could hang out with, talk with and eat food with. This, I’m discovering is a picture of what our attitude and mentality should be towards those that don’t know God.

Kimm is a good friend; we connect on a deep level. We have amazing conversations about all kinds of things. But she doesn’t know God. She will in time I believe, but right now all I can do is love her as a friend, and continue to pray for her.

It makes me sick though, to hear churches views on homosexuality, not because I necessarily disagree with the heart of the message, but how they present this message then puts up massive walls that closes the homosexual community off even more to hearing about how much God loves them, and how much they need Him to fulfill this huge void, that only God Himself can fill. In the big picture, the sin of homosexuality is no different then the sin of lust, murder or theft. That Jesus died for them just as much me, and to look upon my sin as more acceptable is completely wrong and unbiblical.

I think everyone should have a friend just like Kimm, someone that can clue you in on what is happening in culture. Someone that doesn’t hold your same, lets face it, narrow way of thinking. That as Christians we should be just as much in and involved in culture as Jesus was. That no longer can we afford to hide behind or renovated suburban church walls, but we should be out, in and among those whom we are called to reach. That when we do, we will connect with the heart of God in a much deeper way than we can ever imagine.